Earthquake


 

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There is grief in my anger and anger in my grief

I remember words you promised

And things you never did

I remember the weight of carrying you,

while dragging myself

I choked on silent hopes and drowned in hopeless dreams

I disappeared before my own eyes

I survived your anger

Your painful tears

Your daggered remarks

I am the maker and victim of my own earthquake

I have yet to heal from this hurt

I miss so much, yet I miss so little

I want to yell and cry and laugh

I’m so mad at you

I’m so sorry

I’m so sad

I’m so glad

This feeling of loss is madness

I will never be able to live a day without remembering you

The sun will forever cast a shadow in your shape

How I loved you

But that love was not enough to make up for what we lacked

In the rubble of this tragedy, I found myself

I found peace and joy and love

Without you

And that’s the most tragic part of all

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4 thoughts on “Earthquake

    1. Thank you. It’s been almost 2 years and while the pain is no longer debilitating, it lingers. I’ve moved on and I’m happier now than I’ve been in a very long time, yet I still feel a sense of loss.

      Like

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