- There is a rabbit in the United States named BB Buttons. Her name is a product of arguments based on the fact that a) the mother is named Bun-Bun hence the name is sort of taken and b) Buttons is a decent name.
- There is a spot on this rabbit. Do not confuse it with a slot. I know at first glance you might think a slot is reasonable for a rabbit named Buttons but I assure you, this is a spot.
- Yet another spot. These fuckers are everywhere. Like blood on a white wall in a murder scene. Again, you might be inclined to confuse this spot with a previous spot but that would be erroneous. This spot is its own and refuses to be defined by your preconceived notions of spots.
- Claw’s. Singular possessive. These feet are owned by a singular claw. I suspect the villain from Inspector Gadget is behind this modern day animal extremity slavery. Go Go Gadget Emancipation.
- Woah shit. Another spot. This time on a completely different side of the rabbit. I did not see that coming. At. All.
- Like Cindy Crawford’s beauty mark, BB Buttons has set her personal brand with a distinctive poop mark. Not too big to be overpowering and not too small to be mistaken as dirt. A distinct jewel.
I also would like to note the artistic metaphor. The hand holding the rabbit is likely mine and is appropriately flipping the bird and saying, “F this rabbit”. If she wasn’t so cute and affectionate she would already be a nice pair of house shoes and an inedible soup.